Mother
Your greatest gift to me
was the opportunity
to escape
because of your
constant indifference
to me...
until you cast me
aside.
I can only imagine
the life I knew
when I slithered
out of your womb
into a cold room.
Surely,
at that very first look
into your eyes
I saw nothing -
a great abyss
a stark emptiness...
one who had never known
love, joy, sympathy
or affection.
Yet I was seduced
and drawn to seek
someting instinctual that must
have existed within
everyone.
What was it
that kept me looking
for something
anything to appear
behind those eyes?
One day I let down my guard.
I let my hand rest within striking distance.
I recoiled at your touch,
faster than the mere thought
could occur,
I pulled my hand away
from your cold flesh
and your eyes,
you face -
was that of the rattlesnake's.
I still visit the Serpentarium
I still stare
and stare at this snake...
as if enchanted,
or perhaps I stare and stare
knowing you cannot touch me
from behind the glass
enclosure...
your tongue flickers
as it seeks me out
tasting the space between us.
There is something desirable
about this feeling
something vicarious...
I don't need a photo
to know what I should avoid.
It's always been you.
I'm finally through.