Lynn Denise Krupey (1967-2015) – What She Made Possible
There is a conversation that I started with someone about my guilt and problems with things I didn’t say to Lynn before she died. There was no closure. Lynn and I lived as husband and wife for years back in the 90s. It should have lasted longer but I had problems back in 2000 when she got sick. She was born with a terminal disease called Cystic Fibrosis and I felt I should have been prepared to cope with the day when her life would be threatened… I believed all these years that I should have been strong for her to support her when she became sick. I knew she had this disease from the moment I met her.
I was trying to describe how she made it possible for me to have helped a hundred people, maybe two hundred, maybe more. To fully appreciate that one must understand what it is that one means when I say I helped others. My career was in the psychiatric/mental health field. Mental Illness is viewed as a medical or biological illness and so one might not know what it is to help a person heal through non-biological or non-medical interventions. I would have to get into the psychological and emotional complexities of what people experience. Despite being extremely verbose (seldom at a loss to find words) it is hard to put into words what one is observing another person’s experience that is part of the process I am describing. How does one encapsulate in words the ineffable?
Similarly, it would be hard for me to describe what it is that Lynn did that nurtured this capacity within me when it was necessary for me. There were moments spent with Lynn when I knew that something was happening within me – or something we were experiencing together. It is as real as every time I knew that I had helped someone in some way. Each time I knew that I had made a difference that was helpful it was different but I knew there was something real that was happening… and I was facilitating the process.